You know, stuff...

The Shopping is now complete. All I have to do is try and distribute the weight into 2 suitcases equally, so that I may avoid paying the $25 per piece overweight baggage penalty.

I have no space left.

The suitcases are full, both by weight, and by volume. And some of my stuff is still left outside. I am now faced with the difficult task of deciding what goes and what stays behind in America. My daily work clothes, that include all my chef coats and pants, tee-shirts, and stuffy work socks are not coming along anyway. The Anti-slip sole chef shoes I purchased for work are now quite grotty, fungus-infested and are otherwise coming apart. It makes no sense to take those along, right?
Some of my other tee-shirts are quite worn, so I may leave those too...let's see, what else?...A large and very heavy Lava-lamp, something a friend of mine is desperate to lay claim to, will have to stay put. So will the various computer-related paraphernalia that I have gathered over time. And then there are my toiletries, which are numerous, and all of which will stay behind as well. I do not see the idea behind carrying about halved bottles of conditioner and aftershave.

Still, it amazes me. the capacity of man to surround himself with material things. When I came here, all I had were my clothes, my books and little else. Everything neatly packed into two suitcases. Now, I am returning with the same number of cases, but I have had to leave so much behind, it feels so utterly wasteful. All the energy I've expended, all the money I've spent, all the things I've gathered, wasted. I tried so hard not to end up in this consumerist claptrap of buying anything I lay my eyes on, and to an extent, I succeeded. I resisted the urge to buy a pair of Ralph Lauren/CK/DKNY/Diesel jeans. I steered away from Home Depot as much as I could. I controlled the desire to buy a half-pound of a San Daniele ham at $70 a pound. I did not buy the very expensive vial of white truffle oil. I did not uncork a single bottle of wine. Most of all, I still have not been lured to commit the ultimate act of self-indulgence, and buy an iPod. Still, I have ended up with so much...stuff.

Now accepting Questions-II

In my previous post, I described some of the questions that I had to face and give a suitable reply to in my last days at the Olive Garden. Some questions, such as the one regarding crime and punishment in India, were truly ridiculous, but maybe I forgot to imply the earnestness of my interrogators. Most of the queries fielded were asked with what could be interpreted as the utmost sincerity, and I did my best to reply to each question with due tact and accuracy.

I admire the courage of my former co-employees, for deciding to come out of their collective bubbles, and reaching out. One of them even remarked that he/she had not paid much attention in school, so did not know a lot about the rest of the world. I find that sort of sincerity and earnestness commendable. It takes real courage for a person to admit one's shortcomings and correct them.

What I find disappointing is the fact that my interaction with my former collegues was at its peak only at the very beginning and the very end of my employment. We had so many chances to sit and exchange ideas and share knowledge, but somehow, the Insulation tape that is found wound about the heads of many people came undone only at the peaks of my time there. I did not mind the questions, rather, I welcomed them; but my point is that this has demonstrated a tendency that seems to be part of the American psyche in general- That people will only be interested in anything other than their own only when it directly affects them. Very few people, who were otherwise intelligent and educated, showed any curiosity or a willingness to exchange ideas. Why, I ask, are people so content to bask in what they know, and shun what they do not, until it affects them in some way? To limit your worldview within the expanse of your nationality is ignoring the fact that the world we live in is changing fast, cultures are being exported, imported, and adopted, and if you cannot connect with others, you will weaken the health of your society from within.

In a way, this is my fault. My admittedly sporadic attempts to forge meaningful links were misread, misled and misinterpreted, because I could not trade in the same cultural currency that my peers did, which seems to be the dominant mode of social interaction. It was not possible for both me and the others to relate to each other, owing to our different materiel cultures that had but a few things in common. I had hoped to learn so much from people in my own age group, and people older than me, and help ourselves achieve a better understanding of these times, but this was just not to be. Instead, I had a sort of press conference both on my arrival and at my departure, with nothing more than soundbytes flowing in one direction.

What a shame. My ears and eyes, always alert, beheld so much. But for me, it is nothing more than hearsay, data collected at random, presenting crude, unprocessed shapes and colours instead of a coherent picture. If only we could share, I would be able to say with conviction that I lived and connected with the heartbeat of a nation other than my own. but by far, all I have to show for my time here are these words, those opinions I have presented before, and a faint glimmer of hope that my views are flawed, something that I have yet to prove to myself with substantial evidence. I have learnt nothing, and have given nothing.

No journey is complete until you understand your destination.